Sex During A Pandemic: Virtual Mom Meetup (VIDEO)
Not Just Another Thing "to Do"
We are still flushed from our live conversation today with author, mom, and sex + relationship expert Dana Myers about sex during a pandemic. We shone a spotlight on a topic that (for many of us) is falling pretty low on our list of important things to do right now -- and made a case for why we should consider paying attention to it: Making sex (solo sex and partner sex) a priority is a radical act of putting yourself first in a time where we are taking care of 8,000X more shit. And, for those of us in couples, we don't want to come out on the other side of this thing with distance between us -- making an even more difficult rut to heal than the one we already will be dealing with post-coronavirus.
We discussed the questions and thoughts that we had received from the (nsfmg) community in advance of the chat (you can read all of them on IG Stories highlights) -- and took questions live from attendees. Some of the major issues that Dana addressed: How to muster the energy for feeling sexual at the end of an all-consuming day, and constantly surrounded by kids. How do we just "turn it on?" How do we overcome resentment for our partners (in light of the even greater inequities of carrying the mental load right now)? Dana's practical and down-to-Earth advice -- about everything from which vibrators she recommends for solo play, to how to communicate our needs to our partners, to how to schedule time for sex and pleasure -- made us want to take a pen to paper so we could try them out ASAP. Lucky for us, Dana sent us some of the top tips she talked about during the meetup, already in writing, so we don't have to the extra work ourselves. Also, check out her amazing free offer, below:
Dana's Healthy Sex-Life Toolkit:
The W-Word tool (to reduce + heal resentment):
This is a video that explains how to communicate with our partners using the "W-Words" in detail: https://danabmyers.pages.ontraport.net/how-to-get-help
The 3 Questions to Kick Off a Healthy Sex Convo with your Partner (take turns answering + then discuss!):
1. What’s great about our Sex Life?
2. What could be better?
3. How can we co-create a sex life that feels exciting, and compassionate for our relationship right now. (The “right now” bit is important because it acknowledges the challenging circumstances of the moment -- be it a newborn or a pandemic -- and gives each partner the knowing confidence that things can and will change . . . so no one partner feels stuck in the current situation.
The Transition Stretch:
The Transition Stretch is a sensual movement practice to explore BEFORE you plan on having sex . . . giving yourself the time/space/expression to drop into your body, and transition out of tired/irritated Mama and into feeling like a more sensual woman. It’s from this more sensual place that you can open up to the possibilities of pleasure, and to finding a more authentic yes. My follow-along tutorial on the Transition Stretch lives inside my online program, The Satisfied Mama. If you want to check it out, you can do so here: https://www.danabmyers.com/satisfied. And for the mamas in the (nsfmg) community who join, I’ll offer a free, 30-minute coaching session to help support their journey in the program.
Catch the full video of our virtual meetup here (click to watch):